Confined within the dark recess
Enchained with brittle coirs
Thrives the fragile and delicate soul
Obscured to naked eyes
Looks gay to a bystander
The Fiery scorching and
Turbulence felt only at deep end
By the one betwixt
Tranquility greets from across
Myriad pleasures the heart seeks harder
Verdict never in thy hands
Benumbed thy suffers in dark domains
Bogus serenity shoulders apathy
And life swarms as in an illusion
With joy, peace and belonging
Endured just as chimera
P.S. This picture was taken by a friend and it inspired me to write the above poetry (if it can be called so..) Looking at the flower and the fence, I imagined the borders in peoples life, the mind, the physical borders the fences.. (India.. Pakistan the state of Kashmir..) and so on...
This is amazing. I absolutely love it. Brilliant. Poignant, yet real. Romantic, yet honest. Thank you for sharing your talent and noting some words to a beautiful picture.
ReplyDeleteThis is really very well jotted down, beautiful.
ReplyDeleteVery nicely worded. You have wonderful flow and a very good vocab!
ReplyDelete:) you have a command at the vocab....
ReplyDeletewell worded...
the photo and the title is unique.
ReplyDeleteAnd the words perfectly put to it.
I am really delighted at your usage of "thy"...felt like I am reading some romantic poetry of some time back. And yes as always the choice of words is remarkable and elevates the thoughts intended to express...loved it and would like to read it over and over("wont get cloyed")! Love you and take care my sweet:-)
ReplyDeleteThis is tough SP! You are extremely demanding :) Totally enjoyed the poem :)
ReplyDeleteThe words are beautiful indeed...though I admit..I had to do multiple readings to understand and take it in :)
ReplyDeletewow this is really a creative poem!
ReplyDeleteeach & every words are very expressive!
keep writing :)
It's a brilliant piece, I'm amazed by it and this is one poem you should be very proud of!
ReplyDeleteSaru
very mature writing :) the flow was good..and so was d concept..liked it!
ReplyDeletesarah
Lovely. The third para in particular.
ReplyDeleteHey MJ.. thank u.. I was quite unsure if this will apply to all, happy that you liked it..
ReplyDeleteHi Aakash - Thank you..
Hi Spicy Sweet and Chintan - :) Oh I am going to print this out.. and show to some one making fun of my language skills.. he he..
Hey Nasnin - I fell in love with this flower that smiles brightly in spite of the ordeals.. so couldn’t just specify as "you" hence "thy".. I hope you never get cloyed too.. Coz I would love to see thee in here.. :)
ReplyDeleteHi Siddhartha - He he! life is demanding too.. cant help it.. BTW who is SP???
Hi Kunal - Thanks for the visit and he he.. I like repeated audience for my writings, so you are always welcome!!
Hey Sowmya - Thanks dear.. glad u liked it!
Hi Saru - Wow dear..thanks for your comments.. I am now!!
ReplyDeleteHey Sara - Its very nice to hear these words from you.. it means a lot to me!
Hi Sameera - those are my fav too.. the freedom within hands grip and still away..!
This is beautiful KP :) Your command over the language is too good... Keep it up up up!!! :D
ReplyDeleteDear KP,
ReplyDeleteIt is true, isn't it, that we build borders to guard the "bogus serenity". Nice thoughts...probing the "delicate soul obscured to naked eyes"...
Well done!
Best wishes.
ps. A small typo, I think...did you mean "coir" and not "choirs"?
Hello Arjun Mashe.. Yep indeed it is the wall of inhibition we build on yourself is more powerful than the international borders..
ReplyDeletePS: err.. thanks changing nw..!
Hi Anand - Oh.. thank you.. (blushing)